Kody Brown: My Ex-Wives Were Only Good for adult!

Look, we don’t mean to be crass, okay?

But we also just need to tell it like it is.

And it’s like this:

Kody Brown just basically referred to his three ex-wives as c-m dumpsters.

On the most recent episode of Sister Wives, Kody delved into his failed romances with Christine (who left him in November 2021), Janelle (who left him a year later) and Meri (who left him in January 2023).

He had some very negative things to say about all three women, too.

“I was in terrible relationships but wasn’t willing to discard them, didn’t want to discard them,” Kody said in a confessional. “[I] didn’t even know I was in terrible relationships.”

Kody went on to refer to his marriage to Robyn Brown as “normal” and full of “emotional intimacy,” contrasting it to his trio of spiritual unions.

“Some people call it F&F. And the second word is fight. Or F&F and the first word is fight,” the reality TV star actually said, adding:

That doesn’t create intimacy, that just creates orgasms.

We’re serious, folks.

These were words that came out of Kody Brown’s mouth.

Kody — who, for the record, had not gotten orgasmic with Meri in over a decade before the couple split — was especially harsh on this ex during the episode.

“This marriage was on the rocks the entire marriage,” he said of Meri, with whom he exchanged vows in 1990 and from whom he divorced in 2014.

“And how would I know that? Because I had such a better relationship with Janelle, with Christine, with Robyn and Janelle and Christine didn’t survive.”

Kody even said he should have dumped Meri 25 years ago, having previously blamed God for why he stuck around beyond that.

“Don’t blame me for not loving you. I was doing my duty,” Kody also said in a confessional. “Blame yourself if I don’t love you, okay?”

We really hope Meri, Janelle and Christine watched this installment and were more grateful than ever before for having walked away from such an awful human being.

“My choice was always to stay. Had I wanted to leave sooner, I would have left sooner,” Meri told Kody on Sunday’s episode, noting she took the steps to “terminate” their union with their church.

Thankfully, it seems as though Meri has moved on at this point.

She can do so much better than a guy who has no interest in her as a person in any way, shape or form.

“I don’t want any more enemies, and I don’t want another loss,” Kody told viewers. “I just hope that in the future, Meri will call me when she’s got something fun to share.”

When she’s got something fun to share.

What a sweetheart.